That time I was sexually harassed at a Packers game

I was going to write about the Packers steamrolling the Bears this past weekend, but what else is there to say? Garbage time officially started at the beginning of the second half, and it would have been a mercy move had the players given kids from De Pere, Bayport and Ashwaubenon a turn at taking on the Bears at that point.

Instead, I’m going to use this forum to share a personal experience from that night and point out that it is the first time that I did not feel at ease at Lambeau Field. At halftime, while the Packers were likely laughing it up in the locker room, I was sexually harassed by a fellow Packers fan I had never met.

This topic has been in the media quite a lot lately. Most people are familiar with the woman who videoed herself walking around New York while receiving 108 lewd catcalls while, well, just walking around New York. And my own local paper just ran Los Angeles Times’ Meghan Daum’s outstanding editorial just this past weekend about how we as a society have become so desensitized to such behavior that we just silently accept it, often blaming the woman for “asking for it.”

But let me get one thing straight–I wasn’t asking for it, and no one could conceivably blame the way I was dressed. Winter coat with an extra layers underneath and a pair of jeans, I wasn’t exactly dressed in a come hither manner.

Yet that didn’t matter. And it shouldn’t matter whether or not I was there with my husband. But the fact that he was not in the room at the time someone how signaled to this creep that I “didn’t belong” to anyone else and was a target.

I have been regularly going to home games since 2008. Our seats are in the club level, and there is a public box just above our section. It’s where people go to warm up during the half, eat a snack or charge their cell phone.

I went in there to charge my phone. Like many moms, I don’t want to be without it when my kids are elsewhere. So I plugged into the wall while my husband headed to the bathroom and concessions. He was bored and needed to stretch his legs. No big, we do that all the time.

I must have been in there minute or two, leaning against the wall flipping through Twitter before he approached. He was a Packers fan. His buddies wore blue and orange. He looked like he was in his late fifties at best, perhaps his early sixties.

“Hey, are you sleeping?” he asked me.

“No, I’m charging my phone,” I answered as I went back to what I was doing. I  could smell the alcohol on him, and really didn’t want to talk to him.

And that’s when he started. He closed in on my personal space and tried to ramp up what he thought was, no doubt, his love-sexy charm.

“Hey, just think of me as Bill Clinton.”

I ignored him and turned away. Go away, little drunk man. I really wasn’t up for it.

The innuendo continued. He kept getting closer. Had he touched me, I would’ve either decked him or found security.

Oh yes, you’re moves are so persuasive. Let me drop everything so I can make out with you in the bathroom. Seriously, who would ever fall for that crap?

He wouldn’t stop, and was irritated I ignored him. My phone was charged to 44%. That would get me through the game if I didn’t use it, right?

Meanwhile, the world just kept spinning in that warming skybox. No one else in the room seemed to notice what this creep was doing proving that this behavior can, in fact, happen just about anywhere and people either chose to ignore it or are so desensitized they don’t even see it.

“Back off!” I warned him, just loud enough for some around me to hear. My posture changed. Imagine one of those really brassed off cobras that just reared its head giving you the option to go away or die. That was me at that moment.

That’s when someone stepped in. A gentleman who sits one row ahead of us leaned in and told him, “Why don’t you leave her alone. She’s sitting with us.” After all, that’s what the No More campaign is promoting. No more sitting on the sidelines while this nonsense continues.

But he leaned in again, and that urge to hit someone really hard resurfaced for the first time since I was eight-years-old. (That’s the only time in my life I’ve ever punched someone.) At that point, I had little faith in security. They’re nice guys in red vests and all, but security and the GBPD did little to nothing last year at the playoff game when the slobbering drunk behind me kept puking and puking and puking all because he said, “I didn’t do it.”

So instead, I walked away and told him in no uncertain terms to, well, let’s just say it involved an expletive that would horrify my mother and my dad would give me a high-five for using. At the end of the day, I loved my season tickets more than I hated that creep.

I’m still angry about it three days later. It’s the first time I did not feel at  home in my stadium. It’s the first time I felt like a thing and not a person there. How dare this jackass make me feel this way.

But it raises a bigger question–how often does it happen at Lambeau? Clearly I wasn’t the first and won’t be the last. After all, women are just objects, things. What business do we have going to a football game? After all it’s a man’s sport. Shouldn’t we be at home ironing clothes or whatever those Stepford Wives are supposed to be doing?

I resent the fact that he believed that I was alone (ie, not there under the supervision of a man) and therefore I was free for the taking, that I was a possession to be had.

But it shouldn’t matter. It really shouldn’t. Whether or not I was there with my husband, dad, brother or my college friend should not be the only deterrent form this type of behavior. After all, this isn’t Saudi Arabia.

I am a fan too. I am part of the Packers Family. I am not, nor will I ever be a piece of meat.

Newsflash creepers: we don’t want your advances. We are not pieces of meat. We are human beings. How dare you think it is okay to act that way?

No more she obviously wanted it. No more boys will be boys. No more “I was only joking.” No more “You should take it as a compliment.” No more “It’s not my problem.”

No More.

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Kelly Hodgson is a writer for PackersTalk.com and you can listen to her as a Co-Host of Out of the Pocket. You can also follow Kelly on Twitter at @ceallaigh_k

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85 thoughts on “That time I was sexually harassed at a Packers game

  1. Um, Why didnt you go to security or police? No faith? You didnt try to get help and just sat there and took the abuse? You should have gotten help. Cops would have watched him and eventually kicked him out if he kept it up.

  2. If it weren’t so sad, it would be incredibly ironic that the first comment out of the gate is victim blaming.

    Exhibit A for why this nonsense continues in so-called civilized society, ladies and gentlemen.

  3. Didnt blame the victim. Go get help! Ask true Packers fans for help! I would have shut this guy down in one minute or hauled him out of the stadium myself.

  4. Why should she have to alert them? She said at one point she spoke loud enough to be heard, and had one gentleman spoke to the idiot once. I would have asked him to leave, and than gotten security. Point is this shouldn’t happen in the first place. Where are people’s manners? If your going to a public event, and get so trashed you hit on someone, they tell you to back off and you don’t, that’s just sick. He should have backed off. I’m not sure how security is at Lambeau, but I’ve been to enough live events to know security can’t catch everything. Someone should have gotten the proper authorities involved. She shouldn’t even have had to deal with this at all, and I for one feel appalled that it happened. We need to wake up and not tolerate this behavior any longer. No more, means no more.

  5. While this man should have left you alone, and by the facts you have stated ultimately did; his behavior does not constitute harassment. First of all, “sexual harassment” is a term that applies in the workplace and refers to severe and pervasive conduct that alters the terms and conditions of the working environment. You’ve stated that you were a fan attending the game with your husband, not an employee of the Packers.

    You are complaining of civil harassment. In Wisconsin, the legal definition of harassment includes:

    Abuse;
    Sexual assault;
    Stalking;
    Striking, shoving, kicking or otherwise subjecting another person to physical contact;
    Attempting or threatening to abuse, sexually assault, stalk, or subject another to physical contact;
    A repeated course of conduct or series of acts which harass or intimidate another person and which serve no legitimate (valid) purpose*
    * Wis. Stat. § 813.125(1)

    Although this individual’s advances were unwanted, none of his behavior rises to the level of “harassment.” Indeed, flirting with someone in a social situation such as a Packer game or in a bar is not illegal. Nowhere in your statement do you indicate that this man touched you, followed you, threatened you or intimidated the individual who intervened in the situation.

    The comments above are exactly correct. If this man’s behavior made you uncomfortable you should have immediately notified the vast number of security officials available to stop misconduct before it gets out of hand. Instead you swore at the man and likely exacerbated the situation. This “article” should be taken as evidence of what not to do rather than what to do. The best thing that happened here was the individual sitting in front of you intervening peacefully in the situation. Bystander intervention works best when someone is not afraid to defuse a potential situation. You stated that you wanted to hit the man. Would that have been the answer?

    There is no place for a man or a woman to continue to make unwanted advances toward someone. However, there were multiple solutions to the problem that you could have taken including walking away, finding security or calling a family member, friend, or the police. Instead you yelled and argued with a man making conversation with you.

  6. David M.–
    First of all, “sexual harassment” is a term that applies in the workplace and refers to severe and pervasive conduct that alters the terms and conditions of the working environment. You’ve stated that you were a fan attending the game with your husband, not an employee of the Packers.
    —-
    No, it does not need to be severe, it can be as little as a joke or inappropriate comment. And she does not need to be an employee to be ‘eligible’ to be succeptible to harassment.

    The point of all this is everyone who purchases a ticket SHOULD be allowed to enjoy the game free of harassment, regardless of sex or team affiliation.

  7. David, thanks for mansplaining it to me.

    1. I did not engage in an argument with him. I told him to stop and he did not.

    2. I was doing something in the room and was trying to charge my phone. Why should I leave when I had a purpose to be there?

    3. Don’t you dare push this off as somehow my fault. Congratulations. You’re part of the problem.

    Do please save your erudite citation of Wisconsin statutes, thanks.

  8. What’s the big deal? A man made an advance towards a female in a public place, consisting of all of 12 words. She rejected him. End of story.

    I notice the author is combative when confronted with differing opinions about what actually happened from people that took the time to comment. That should tell any reader all they need to know about the motivation to write this opinion piece.

    Instead of filing a police report and actually taking a stand with “NO MORE”, this author chose to not do so. Why?

    No more means no more. It doesn’t mean Wed morning blogs about an incident that can’t have the critical parts of the story verified.

  9. Um this guy got into her personal space. It’s different if I walk up to her keep personal space and hit on her. This guy didn’t do that. She also stated her reason for not going to the cops. If they didn’t toss a puker because he said he didn’t do it what are they going to do when this ass says he didn’t do it? Then another guy intervened and he STILL didn’t leave her alone. Skeptical you skipped some of the facts of the story. Maybe you and Dave think this is acceptable behavior, but as the father of 3 daughters I don’t.

  10. Sounds like somebody is a feminist and a whiner. Why you have to attack with “mansplaining” If a man would say on here “womansplaining” he would be run out of town. Kelly, maybe you have an attitude problem?

  11. I have daughters and they’re taught to report offensive behavior to the authorities, not blog about it 4 days later so that one can appear to be a victim and a hero out slaying the evils of the patriarchy.

    ‘Some guy puked and they didn’t do anything. THEREFORE, no sense reporting sexual harassment’ is a terrible argument and again questions the motivation.

    Again, the guy said 12 words, none of which were threatening or offensive. At no time were the words “I’m not interested” or “No thank you” used. Those simple words, or any rejection, would’ve likely ended this entire non-noteworthy incident.

    Any number of things could have been done. Doing nothing and then blogging about it later seems to be at the bottom of that list.

  12. Um, Why didnt you go to security or police? No faith? You didnt try to get help and just sat there and took the abuse? You should have gotten help. Cops would have watched him and eventually kicked him out if he kept it up.

  13. If it weren’t so sad, it would be incredibly ironic that the first comment out of the gate is victim blaming.

    Exhibit A for why this nonsense continues in so-called civilized society, ladies and gentlemen.

  14. Didnt blame the victim. Go get help! Ask true Packers fans for help! I would have shut this guy down in one minute or hauled him out of the stadium myself.

  15. Why should she have to alert them? She said at one point she spoke loud enough to be heard, and had one gentleman spoke to the idiot once. I would have asked him to leave, and than gotten security. Point is this shouldn’t happen in the first place. Where are people’s manners? If your going to a public event, and get so trashed you hit on someone, they tell you to back off and you don’t, that’s just sick. He should have backed off. I’m not sure how security is at Lambeau, but I’ve been to enough live events to know security can’t catch everything. Someone should have gotten the proper authorities involved. She shouldn’t even have had to deal with this at all, and I for one feel appalled that it happened. We need to wake up and not tolerate this behavior any longer. No more, means no more.

  16. While I will agree that perhaps there were better ways to handle this, I think the point is that this shouldn’t have happened in the first place! Why has no one commented on that? Just because he was drunk does not make his behavior okay. It’s a symptom of the larger problem that men (no, not all men, but clearly a significant portion of them) think it’s okay to leer at women, make suggestive/sexual remarks at them, etc.

    I’m sorry, Skeptical, but I would find “Think of me as Bill Clinton” as offensive. It’s basically an invitation to a sexual act. And she did ask him to back off, after she tried to ignore him.

    And yes, we are only hearing one side of the story. I’m not suggesting that this didn’t happen to the author or anything like that, but without being there we all have slightly different interpretations of how it went down, based on the facts we were given.

  17. Some of these comments are downright shameful.

    It’s HER decision whether she wants to report the harassment or not, but it’s the harassment itself that’s being overlooked by Sean Doyle, “Skeptical” and company. This shouldn’t be happening anywhere. I’m glad to hear that someone intervened, but the amount of blame being placed on Kelly here for simply being a victim is absurd.

    Kelly, I’m very sorry that this happened to you. It’s unacceptable anywhere.

  18. You weren’t harassed. You were hit on. This blog entry makes a mockery of all women who have been the victims of abuse and/or violence. The man said some things you didn’t like. I’m sure I’m doing the same right now and I’m a woman. Get a life or report the incident. You were part of the problem. If you were able to yell at him and considered hitting him you obviously didn’t feel that threatened. Get a life.

  19. While this man should have left you alone, and by the facts you have stated ultimately did; his behavior does not constitute harassment. First of all, “sexual harassment” is a term that applies in the workplace and refers to severe and pervasive conduct that alters the terms and conditions of the working environment. You’ve stated that you were a fan attending the game with your husband, not an employee of the Packers.

    You are complaining of civil harassment. In Wisconsin, the legal definition of harassment includes:

    Abuse;
    Sexual assault;
    Stalking;
    Striking, shoving, kicking or otherwise subjecting another person to physical contact;
    Attempting or threatening to abuse, sexually assault, stalk, or subject another to physical contact;
    A repeated course of conduct or series of acts which harass or intimidate another person and which serve no legitimate (valid) purpose*
    * Wis. Stat. § 813.125(1)

    Although this individual’s advances were unwanted, none of his behavior rises to the level of “harassment.” Indeed, flirting with someone in a social situation such as a Packer game or in a bar is not illegal. Nowhere in your statement do you indicate that this man touched you, followed you, threatened you or intimidated the individual who intervened in the situation.

    The comments above are exactly correct. If this man’s behavior made you uncomfortable you should have immediately notified the vast number of security officials available to stop misconduct before it gets out of hand. Instead you swore at the man and likely exacerbated the situation. This “article” should be taken as evidence of what not to do rather than what to do. The best thing that happened here was the individual sitting in front of you intervening peacefully in the situation. Bystander intervention works best when someone is not afraid to defuse a potential situation. You stated that you wanted to hit the man. Would that have been the answer?

    There is no place for a man or a woman to continue to make unwanted advances toward someone. However, there were multiple solutions to the problem that you could have taken including walking away, finding security or calling a family member, friend, or the police. Instead you yelled and argued with a man making conversation with you.

  20. Unfortunately my wife and I encountered a similar situation at the 2012 WC Game. We got the most-affordable tickets (read: cheap) we could find, and ended up in the corner of the north end zone. The four guys in front of us were pounding beer the whole first half since sales were going to be cut off at half. In the third quarter, the drunkest one of them all finished off the fifth of whiskey and began chatting up my wife. During a TV timeout she asked if we could switch places. We were all standing, so it was easy enough. After the switch, he maneuvered to the other side of his buddies and back next to her. He noticed i hadnt had a sip the whole game (because I was driving us home) and made a comment about it. She said pretty bluntly we came to enjoy the GAME, not to get hammered. At this point his buddy realized we were annoyed and reeled his friend back to his seat where they left us alone. The creep managed to fall down three times over the course of the remaining game, the third time he needed assistance from his buddy to get back on his feet. After the game I kept questioning myself as to if I should have interjected earlier, but at the time I could only think there were four of them, and one of me. That’s no way to experience a playoff win over a division opponent.

    Im sorry you had to go through that experience, Kelly. Unfortunately, the NFL, and even our beloved Packers, aren’t being proactive enough to keep the game day experience pleasant for those wanting to watch football. It’s no wonder they’ve had difficulty selling tickets to cold weather games, where consumption is higher ‘to stay warm’.

  21. David M.–
    First of all, “sexual harassment” is a term that applies in the workplace and refers to severe and pervasive conduct that alters the terms and conditions of the working environment. You’ve stated that you were a fan attending the game with your husband, not an employee of the Packers.
    —-
    No, it does not need to be severe, it can be as little as a joke or inappropriate comment. And she does not need to be an employee to be ‘eligible’ to be succeptible to harassment.

    The point of all this is everyone who purchases a ticket SHOULD be allowed to enjoy the game free of harassment, regardless of sex or team affiliation.

  22. Julie –

    This is what you consider being hit on? Last I checked, men who were hitting on a women back down if she says no. It crosses over into the line of harassment when someone won’t back down. The man didn’t only say things Kelly didn’t like. He invaded her personal space, did not back off when she requested him multiple times, and didn’t even stop when another man told him to back off.

    Kelly is voicing a huge problem when it comes to football games – not contributing to a problem. I think you should be the one to get a life for demeaning someone who had was harassed at a game in such a manner.

    As women, we should support each other – not attack and victim blame, and say that Kelly is part of the problem. Guess what? She’s not. And some women can’t “get a life” because the men consistently harass them and it escalates into a very dangerous situation.

    I think the down votes on your comment speak to how asinine you sounded.

  23. David, thanks for mansplaining it to me.

    1. I did not engage in an argument with him. I told him to stop and he did not.

    2. I was doing something in the room and was trying to charge my phone. Why should I leave when I had a purpose to be there?

    3. Don’t you dare push this off as somehow my fault. Congratulations. You’re part of the problem.

    Do please save your erudite citation of Wisconsin statutes, thanks.

  24. I’ll give some advice a psychologist once told me. She said that if someone has a concern, it’s real and it happened because it’s real and happened to that person. Therefore, it matters.

    You can misconstrue legal terms ad nauseum, but it doesn’t change the fact that someone was advancing unwanted and lewd behaviors after being told to stop. That is never acceptable.

    If you side with the drunken idiot, and/or criticize this blog or the author’s feelings, congratulations, you’re what’s wrong with society these days. You’re victim blaming and probably have deeply seated psychological issues. For the benefit of the people around you, please seek out help.

  25. What’s the big deal? A man made an advance towards a female in a public place, consisting of all of 12 words. She rejected him. End of story.

    I notice the author is combative when confronted with differing opinions about what actually happened from people that took the time to comment. That should tell any reader all they need to know about the motivation to write this opinion piece.

    Instead of filing a police report and actually taking a stand with “NO MORE”, this author chose to not do so. Why?

    No more means no more. It doesn’t mean Wed morning blogs about an incident that can’t have the critical parts of the story verified.

  26. Um this guy got into her personal space. It’s different if I walk up to her keep personal space and hit on her. This guy didn’t do that. She also stated her reason for not going to the cops. If they didn’t toss a puker because he said he didn’t do it what are they going to do when this ass says he didn’t do it? Then another guy intervened and he STILL didn’t leave her alone. Skeptical you skipped some of the facts of the story. Maybe you and Dave think this is acceptable behavior, but as the father of 3 daughters I don’t.

  27. Sounds like somebody is a feminist and a whiner. Why you have to attack with “mansplaining” If a man would say on here “womansplaining” he would be run out of town. Kelly, maybe you have an attitude problem?

  28. I have daughters and they’re taught to report offensive behavior to the authorities, not blog about it 4 days later so that one can appear to be a victim and a hero out slaying the evils of the patriarchy.

    ‘Some guy puked and they didn’t do anything. THEREFORE, no sense reporting sexual harassment’ is a terrible argument and again questions the motivation.

    Again, the guy said 12 words, none of which were threatening or offensive. At no time were the words “I’m not interested” or “No thank you” used. Those simple words, or any rejection, would’ve likely ended this entire non-noteworthy incident.

    Any number of things could have been done. Doing nothing and then blogging about it later seems to be at the bottom of that list.

  29. “when she requested him multiple times”. Lauren and I must be reading different stories.

    Why do I have to be supporting the guy if I think the author is also culpable? That’s a pretty broad brush to paint but likely one easily performed, if sharing the same last name as the author.

  30. While I will agree that perhaps there were better ways to handle this, I think the point is that this shouldn’t have happened in the first place! Why has no one commented on that? Just because he was drunk does not make his behavior okay. It’s a symptom of the larger problem that men (no, not all men, but clearly a significant portion of them) think it’s okay to leer at women, make suggestive/sexual remarks at them, etc.

    I’m sorry, Skeptical, but I would find “Think of me as Bill Clinton” as offensive. It’s basically an invitation to a sexual act. And she did ask him to back off, after she tried to ignore him.

    And yes, we are only hearing one side of the story. I’m not suggesting that this didn’t happen to the author or anything like that, but without being there we all have slightly different interpretations of how it went down, based on the facts we were given.

  31. Some of these comments are downright shameful.

    It’s HER decision whether she wants to report the harassment or not, but it’s the harassment itself that’s being overlooked by Sean Doyle, “Skeptical” and company. This shouldn’t be happening anywhere. I’m glad to hear that someone intervened, but the amount of blame being placed on Kelly here for simply being a victim is absurd.

    Kelly, I’m very sorry that this happened to you. It’s unacceptable anywhere.

  32. You weren’t harassed. You were hit on. This blog entry makes a mockery of all women who have been the victims of abuse and/or violence. The man said some things you didn’t like. I’m sure I’m doing the same right now and I’m a woman. Get a life or report the incident. You were part of the problem. If you were able to yell at him and considered hitting him you obviously didn’t feel that threatened. Get a life.

  33. Julie –

    This is what you consider being hit on? Last I checked, men who were hitting on a women back down if she says no. It crosses over into the line of harassment when someone won’t back down. The man didn’t only say things Kelly didn’t like. He invaded her personal space, did not back off when she requested him multiple times, and didn’t even stop when another man told him to back off.

    Kelly is voicing a huge problem when it comes to football games – not contributing to a problem. I think you should be the one to get a life for demeaning someone who had was harassed at a game in such a manner.

    As women, we should support each other – not attack and victim blame, and say that Kelly is part of the problem. Guess what? She’s not. And some women can’t “get a life” because the men consistently harass them and it escalates into a very dangerous situation.

    I think the down votes on your comment speak to how asinine you sounded.

  34. “Just think of me as Bill Clinton.”

    And Kelly has culpability in this where again?

    Explain it to me slowly.

    Seriously?

  35. I’ll give some advice a psychologist once told me. She said that if someone has a concern, it’s real and it happened because it’s real and happened to that person. Therefore, it matters.

    You can misconstrue legal terms ad nauseum, but it doesn’t change the fact that someone was advancing unwanted and lewd behaviors after being told to stop. That is never acceptable.

    If you side with the drunken idiot, and/or criticize this blog or the author’s feelings, congratulations, you’re what’s wrong with society these days. You’re victim blaming and probably have deeply seated psychological issues. For the benefit of the people around you, please seek out help.

  36. Kelly I realize that you felt uncomfortable by the situation. You have every right to do so and in that regard I understand where you’re coming from. But comparing what happened to you to sexual harassment and including this story in a comparison to rape culture is part of the problem just as much as rape culture itself. A drunk older guy hit on you. He didn’t touch you, he didn’t grab you, he didn’t make you feel legitimately threatened by his actions. Bringing attention to this is the wrong kind of exposure for rape culture. I’m sorry but YOU Kelly are part of the problem. I flipped over to Facebook directly after reading this article (just part of my circular website surfing) and read about how a friend of mine just got done with her court case of the man who groped her in a subway and then proceeded to whisper exactly what he wanted to do to her in her ear. THAT is something that needs attention to it. THAT is part of the problem. Girls that think an old drunk guy hitting on them is sexual harassment are girls who want the attention from rape culture and need to realize they live in a big girl world.

  37. “when she requested him multiple times”. Lauren and I must be reading different stories.

    Why do I have to be supporting the guy if I think the author is also culpable? That’s a pretty broad brush to paint but likely one easily performed, if sharing the same last name as the author.

  38. “Just think of me as Bill Clinton.”

    And Kelly has culpability in this where again?

    Explain it to me slowly.

    Seriously?

  39. Kelly I realize that you felt uncomfortable by the situation. You have every right to do so and in that regard I understand where you’re coming from. But comparing what happened to you to sexual harassment and including this story in a comparison to rape culture is part of the problem just as much as rape culture itself. A drunk older guy hit on you. He didn’t touch you, he didn’t grab you, he didn’t make you feel legitimately threatened by his actions. Bringing attention to this is the wrong kind of exposure for rape culture. I’m sorry but YOU Kelly are part of the problem. I flipped over to Facebook directly after reading this article (just part of my circular website surfing) and read about how a friend of mine just got done with her court case of the man who groped her in a subway and then proceeded to whisper exactly what he wanted to do to her in her ear. THAT is something that needs attention to it. THAT is part of the problem. Girls that think an old drunk guy hitting on them is sexual harassment are girls who want the attention from rape culture and need to realize they live in a big girl world.

  40. Yes, I have the same last name as the author. She’s my sister. I’m not afraid to release my name to my words because I’m not a coward using the anonymity of the internet. I know a lot of the story. For Kelly to write about this means something seriously wrong took place. She’s not one to air small things in public forums.

    She did nothing wrong. She is not culpable. End of story. They guy was in the wrong no matter how you want to paint it in that little world of yours.

  41. Julie S. and Sean D. sound like they would be perfect for each other. Their ass backwards way of thinking on this subject is like a match made in heaven.

  42. Any of the people blaming the victim here are tools. That’s pretty evident. I wish the writer, or future writers on this subject (I get this is not easy in the moment) would have gotten more details.

    I personally want to know:

    1. What’s his name?
    2. Is he married?
    3. Is he prominent in the community?

    Having perhaps gotten this information would make this piece more effective and future pieces like it by all authors. Again, in the moment of being abused, this may not be the first thought, and I understand that. I think public and family shame is the ultimate weapon. Thank you and I’m sorry this happened.

  43. I sure hope Skeptical has a blog where they can blog about this blog being a bad blog because the blogger wrote a blog piece about something that happened to them.

    Oh wait, that’s the whole point of a blog. To write about personal experiences and share opinions. Which Kelly did-very, very well.

    Maybe some of the commenters here should read other blogs about things like sexual harassment, rape culture, etc. Read some other personal stories about how Kelly’s incident isn’t the only one to ever happen, that it’s more prevalent than most want to admit, accept, or acknowledge. Then, maybe their moronic way of blaming the author for this incident will start to change.

    Maybe.

  44. I wonder why the author decided to describe the age of the man “harassing” her? What relevance to her story is the fact that he was in his late 50’s/60’s? Why does that matter? Why does it matter that he smelled like alcohol?

    Would she have wrote this blog if the perpetrator was by himself, in his late twenties/early thirties, tall, dark and handsome, well-spoken and stone-sober?

    I think we all know the answer. She would have been flattered by the attention of being hit on by “Brad Pitt”. Instead she’d disgusted because Brad Pitt’s drunk step-uncle hit on her like a lout.

    Sorry but this isn’t sexual harassment. This is an example of a drunk loser thinking he’s funny with his buddies nearby. Same thing happens million times/day in every nightclub in the world…perpetuated by men and women.

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