Packers Week 5: Toasts and Roasts

I was really looking forward to an 8:30am game. With two children under 3 years old, you can imagine little sleep and early mornings rising are a constant at my house. To have the Packer game over with by noon and the rest of the day to relax, maybe take a nap? Yes please! But then the game actually happened. The only will I had after that was to entertain the kids and stare blankly at the afternoon games on the TV. There is no real good way to describe this game except for “absolutely frustrating.” The Green Bay Packers Week 5 matchup saw them start strong against the New York Giants. Business was good in London. But then it just all fell apart.

The Packers lead 20-10 heading into halftime, and everything looked alright. But then it was as if we just abandoned everything that got us there and laid down. They just never seem to put together a complete game so far this season. London was no different. There wasn’t a whole lot to celebrate, and unfortunately there was a lot to be upset with. Let’s see what we’ve got in Packers Week 5, Toasts and Roasts.

Toasts:

Randall Cobb

This week, I only have one toast. Randall Cobb seemed to be the only real bright spot on this team this week. Looking like the Randall Cobb of old, he made 7 catches for 99 yards. Including a catch where Cobb bailed out a scrambling Aaron Rodgers on a 35 yard catch and run. Week 2 I toasted Cobb using a New Glarus Spotted Cow due to his reliability. This week I’m returning to New Glarus but this time using their Moon Man Pale Ale. New Glarus’ website describes Moon Man as a seriously cool cat, comfortable in his own skin, never tries too hard. It’s bold and engaging without pretense. To me, Moon Man is another reliable beer. But it’s a little bolder and tastier.

Aaron Rodgers’ security blanket was there for him today, but like Moon Man, that security blanket had a bit more of an edge this time around. Cheers Mr. Cobb, thanks for being a star in this rough one.

Roasts:

Amari Rodgers

If Amari Rodgers wasn’t a third-round pick, I think he’d be looking for a new team after this week. Who knows, maybe Brian Gutekunst is already ready to cut his losses. We saw Christian Watson take kick returns this week, leaving Amari Rodgers to mainly focus on punt returns. He couldn’t even really do that well, fumbling his only punt return, only to be bailed out by an Isaiah McDuffie recovery. Amari Rodgers is getting Bud Light this week. That’s right, we’re in Wisconsin friends, where we know that Budweiser truly is not a good beer. Maybe it’s good for some, but in this state, we expect more taste, and Bud Light doesn’t have that.

So, Amari Rodgers is Bud Light. For us, he’s just not good. He’s not getting it done. Maybe he’ll find success with someone else, but I’m not sure that’ll be with us. Will he surprise us? Perhaps. But right now, I feel like the Amari Rodgers experiment is nearing its end with other young capable receivers ready to take his spot.

Lack of touches for Aaron Jones and AJ Dillon

Earlier when I mentioned frustration, this was it. This was the main source of my frustration. It has been a known fact that if Aaron Jones only touches the ball 15 or less times, the Packers are likely going to be in the loss column. Low and behold, Aaron Jones only touched it 15 times. His counterpart AJ Dillon, only 6 times. These two in my opinion, the top two skill players on your offense. You give it to them more. Specifically, the fourth quarter, the Giants just scored a touchdown to tie the game. The Defense is gasping for breath on the sidelines. What do we do on Offense? Three straight incompletions and punt. Not even one rushing attempt. Of course, the end of the game is there as well. 3rd and 2, rush the ball with Dillon or Jones and get the first down for 4 shots at the endzone to win. Simply inexcusable.

This lack of touches for our RB’s is getting paired with Key Lime Sour from Prestige Beer Group. This beer was interesting to me, and then I drank it. It tasted like a very watered-down beer with some sourness to it. Just, what are they doing? Much like the Packers not giving the ball to their best players, what are they doing? It left the offense very watered down, and you guessed it, sour.

Joe Barry

I just can’t even start here. This defense is so up and down. You just don’t know what you’re going to get. This defense seems to never send heavy pressure. at a point in the second half, the Giants biggest threat, Saquon Barkley wasn’t on the field. So, send the house at Daniel Jones and force him to beat you! But no, it feels like we’re chasing ghosts on defense on some drives. We’re constantly backing off and not taking risks, and this was evident against the Giants.

Joe Barry, I’m pinning you with Fire Light from Sprecher Brewery. Fire Light to me is basically Sprecher playing it safe and creating a beer that is passable. It might have potential, but it’s just not being utilized. Joe Barry’s defense seems to have all this potential, but it’s not being used. No risks are being taken. So like Fire Light, Joe Barry is not taking risks and just trying to be passable. Well guess what, it’s not working, maybe Joe should try a better beer from Sprecher that challenges the status quo.

Woof. That was the most roasts I’ve had, and least toasts. What a frustrating game. We’re moving on to the Jets though and hopefully some home-cooking and throwback jerseys will get us back to our winning ways.

Greg Meinholz is a 24/7/365 Packers fan. When he’s not spending time with his family, he can be found meditating in his Packers shrine with a good beer. You can follow him on twitter at @gmeinholz.

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